I am a Citizen Soldier. I am a full time student and a full time Mom. My kids are the light of my life. I have a wonderful Husband who is truly a support system and my best friend. I am so fortunate to have such a wonderful family.
Date number three... lucky lucky me. :) I had a lot of fun with Zoey!! We do not get nearly enough one on one time together. That is true for all of the kids. She has such a sweet little personality!! First we went and got her nails done. Shiloh was not available this week so Robin painted her nails. Zoey and Robin really hit it off! Zoey was so pleased that Robin really wanted to talk to her and really listened to her. I think sometimes at that age it feels that no one truely listens. She actually wanted Daniel or I to invite her over to hang out so that she could see her again! Then we went and got our pictures taken in the picture booth. As you can see there was something wrong with the machine and it ruined the bottom picture on each strip. They refunded our money so we will get them redone if they fix the machine, but these ones are stinkin cute anyway!! :)
Then off to the food court. Zoey chose Panda express.... Are we sensing a theme here? lol. It was so much fun just to sit and chat with this young lady. I made her promise to color some pictures and write me some letters, because I will miss her. The treat Zoey chose was a carmel apple dipped in chocolate and drizzled with white chocolate.... Yum yum. She propped up the hand wipe that they provided "because" she said "it IS part of the story!"
If you ever want to see just how strong you are emotionally I would suggest joining any branch of the Military. This has been one of the hardest things I have ever gone through emotionally. Something I would have never guessed when I made the decision. Although I would not take this decision back for anything.
I get asked quite often why I wanted to join the Military. Some ask me in a way as if to say What in the world would make you want to do something that crazy? Some ask because they are surprised but I curious to know what made me make such a big change. Some ask me because they are truly grateful for the choices I am making. Well, I want to answer that question here on my blog. :)
What made me join?
Have you ever had an aha moment? One of those moments where the world makes complete sense for the first time in a long time? An inner peace you find when you make a really big decision and you know it was the right one? I have had that happen to me a few times. Two very important times in the past year. The first was when I realized when and why Daniel and I needed to get married (another story... perhaps another time) And the second, I will go into more detail now. As most of you know I have been going to school full time and help support my family through scholarships alone. I am signed up on every known site that helps you win or earn money for school. One day in November I got an advertisement email from the National Guard because they will pay for school. That hit an old nerve in me that has always wanted to serve my country. Daniel was sitting next to me in that moment and I just jokingly said that maybe I should join the National Guard. We both kind of laughed it off. That night at about 2 AM I woke up and knew without a doubt that this was the answer for me and for my family. I did not know what it was an answer to, I just knew that everything about it felt right. I was at peace with a decision I did not even know I was about to make. Over the next two weeks I would make little jokes about going to boot camp or joining the guard, we always just laughed it off. I thought, there is no way I can leave my family for that long. Besides we were planning a wedding and there were other things going on as well. I realized after the 20th joke or so that I really wasn't kidding and I asked Daniel what he thought about it. I was pretty scared to ask him because that is a major thing to ask someone to support. He just answered very sweetly that he thought that would be awesome and that he would support me 100%. And to this day he has not gone back on that promise. Even when I am scared or hurting, even when he is faced with being a single Dad to my children, he has not doubted this decision. I talked to a recruiter on Dec. 13th, which just happens to be the National Guards birthday. I took the ASVAB a couple of days later and scored 96 of a possible 99. I could have any job the National Guard has to offer. I will be Human Resources for the Special Forces. This is a job that I will be proud of.
Okay now that I answered that seemingly simple question, I want to get back to the part that has been the most emotionally challenging. Maybe I did not know what to expect, but I certainly did not expect what has been happening. There are three reactions that I get when someone finds out that I have joined the military. I get told in a "nice and gentle" way that I am a bad parent. That I am doing something wrong to my children. And I should think more about my family. I know it kind of sounds crazy, but yes there have been more people that have used this approach with me than I care to think about. It makes me sad enough that I have spent more than my share of time crying. I just need to say that I have no doubt that I am doing what is right for my family. And contrary to popular belief I am doing this for my family, and not to them. I think the reason it hurts me so much is that the people that have this reaction do not have faith in me and my instincts as a Mother. They do not believe that I would never do anything that is not in the best interest of my children and my family.
The second type of reaction is very rare, but very appreciated. It mostly comes from strangers. But their reaction is that they are proud of me and very grateful that I am going to bepart of the military that protects them. This instills that sense of pride and brings tears to my eyes because a total stranger feels indebted to me because of what I am willing to do for their freedom.
The third response, which I have only gotten from a couple of people I want to share with you now. When I told my long time friend, Shannon that I was joining the National Guard, she asked all the questions, the where and when and those kind of things. I told her that I wasn't sure how she felt about the military so I wasn't sure if she would try to talk me out of it. (She is always looking out for my best interest) And her response? "Lisa, I know you would never do anything that was not right for your family, and so I am happy for you, and I know without a doubt that it is the best thing for your family." The second was my dear Grandma Davies. Her response? "Lisa, I am so proud of you. Of the two of you. For doing what you know in your heart to be right. I am so very proud. Thank you." I bawled for a half hour. I have been having a hard day with the emotional roller coaster and she said exactly what I needed to hear so badly. Both of these people have such unconditional support for me and the decisions I make in my life. That feels good enough to make me cry. I am so very grateful for this type of support.
I think what hurts worse than any response is the no response from the people that are supposed to be closest to me. Maybe they just don't have anything good to say. I don't know. But what I do know is that I need everyone's unconditional support in such a major decision. I am a good mom. I am a good wife. I look forward to serving and protecting each and every person in this country.
Merlin and I went out today. :) It was so good to spend some time with my boy!! He is growing up so so fast. First we went and got our pictures taken. It made me feel better about my hair actually. Then we headed over to the mall and Merlin chose Panda Express. He asked where we were going to go for lunch. I told him we were going to go to the food court at the mall. He said that is food heaven!!
We went to Game Stop and I told Merlin how much he could spend and he chose three inexpensive used games instead of one. :) He really does belong in this family!! :) For his treat he chose a big piece of peanut butter fudge. I am going to miss this boy. He is such a light in my life!!
I took Charlie out on a Mommy and Daughter outing today so that we could spend some good one on one time together. It was a lot of fun!! First we went and got her nails done. To my surprise one of my good friends in 8th grade was the one that did her nails (Shiloh!!). It was fun to catch up with her. :) Then we went to K-mart and used their photo booth. One strip will be for Charlie, one for Daniel, and the other one will go with me. It was a lot of fun!
We went to the mall for lunch. Charlene chose Panda express and a caramel apple. She was excited because she had never had one before! She got all dressed up and put make-up on for our date. She really knows how to make her old mom feel special!!
Charlene came to me and asked me if I would record her saying something and post it on my blog. I said yes... Here is the video. I sure love this girl and will miss her thoughtful, loving, and tender spirit!
One of my very best friends growing up let me go to her meeting to celebrate 90 days of sobriety!! Not an easy feat!! We are so entirely proud of her and her progress. Here is to the next 24 hours... We love you!!
This is the picture of the Ninety Day Coin that she was given at her meeting. It was really hard to take a picture with no glare, but it says Ninety Days in the middle and it says One Day At A Time around the Ninety Days. Something to be very proud of!!
I will be leaving on February 10th for Boot Camp! I am really excited and really nervous!! And at the moment... Very tired! LOL. It has been a long day!
If you have not had the opportunity to listen to this entire speech, or if it has been awhile, take a moment today to watch or read this incredibly powerful speech!! I will have to admit that it wasn't until my History class last semester that I took the time to read and watch this speech, needless to say I was impressed!!
I am happy to join with you today in what will go down in history as the greatest demonstration for freedom in the history of our nation.
Five score years ago, a great American, in whose symbolic shadow we stand today, signed the Emancipation Proclamation. This momentous decree came as a great beacon light of hope to millions of Negro slaves who had been seared in the flames of withering injustice. It came as a joyous daybreak to end the long night of their captivity.
But one hundred years later, the Negro still is not free. One hundred years later, the life of the Negro is still sadly crippled by the manacles of segregation and the chains of discrimination. One hundred years later, the Negro lives on a lonely island of poverty in the midst of a vast ocean of material prosperity. One hundred years later, the Negro is still languished in the corners of American society and finds himself an exile in his own land. And so we've come here today to dramatize a shameful condition.
In a sense we've come to our nation's capital to cash a check. When the architects of our republic wrote the magnificent words of the Constitution and the Declaration of Independence, they were signing a promissory note to which every American was to fall heir. This note was a promise that all men, yes, black men as well as white men, would be guaranteed the "unalienable Rights" of "Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness." It is obvious today that America has defaulted on this promissory note, insofar as her citizens of color are concerned. Instead of honoring this sacred obligation, America has given the Negro people a bad check, a check which has come back marked "insufficient funds."
But we refuse to believe that the bank of justice is bankrupt. We refuse to believe that there are insufficient funds in the great vaults of opportunity of this nation. And so, we've come to cash this check, a check that will give us upon demand the riches of freedom and the security of justice.
We have also come to this hallowed spot to remind America of the fierce urgency of Now. This is no time to engage in the luxury of cooling off or to take the tranquilizing drug of gradualism. Now is the time to make real the promises of democracy. Now is the time to rise from the dark and desolate valley of segregation to the sunlit path of racial justice. Now is the time to lift our nation from the quicksands of racial injustice to the solid rock of brotherhood. Now is the time to make justice a reality for all of God's children.
It would be fatal for the nation to overlook the urgency of the moment. This sweltering summer of the Negro's legitimate discontent will not pass until there is an invigorating autumn of freedom and equality. Nineteen sixty-three is not an end, but a beginning. And those who hope that the Negro needed to blow off steam and will now be content will have a rude awakening if the nation returns to business as usual. And there will be neither rest nor tranquility in America until the Negro is granted his citizenship rights. The whirlwinds of revolt will continue to shake the foundations of our nation until the bright day of justice emerges.
But there is something that I must say to my people, who stand on the warm threshold which leads into the palace of justice: In the process of gaining our rightful place, we must not be guilty of wrongful deeds. Let us not seek to satisfy our thirst for freedom by drinking from the cup of bitterness and hatred. We must forever conduct our struggle on the high plane of dignity and discipline. We must not allow our creative protest to degenerate into physical violence. Again and again, we must rise to the majestic heights of meeting physical force with soul force.
The marvelous new militancy which has engulfed the Negro community must not lead us to a distrust of all white people, for many of our white brothers, as evidenced by their presence here today, have come to realize that their destiny is tied up with our destiny. And they have come to realize that their freedom is inextricably bound to our freedom.
We cannot walk alone.
And as we walk, we must make the pledge that we shall always march ahead.
We cannot turn back.
There are those who are asking the devotees of civil rights, "When will you be satisfied?" We can never be satisfied as long as the Negro is the victim of the unspeakable horrors of police brutality. We can never be satisfied as long as our bodies, heavy with the fatigue of travel, cannot gain lodging in the motels of the highways and the hotels of the cities. We cannot be satisfied as long as the negro's basic mobility is from a smaller ghetto to a larger one. We can never be satisfied as long as our children are stripped of their self-hood and robbed of their dignity by signs stating: "For Whites Only." We cannot be satisfied as long as a Negro in Mississippi cannot vote and a Negro in New York believes he has nothing for which to vote. No, no, we are not satisfied, and we will not be satisfied until "justice rolls down like waters, and righteousness like a mighty stream."
I am not unmindful that some of you have come here out of great trials and tribulations. Some of you have come fresh from narrow jail cells. And some of you have come from areas where your quest -- quest for freedom left you battered by the storms of persecution and staggered by the winds of police brutality. You have been the veterans of creative suffering. Continue to work with the faith that unearned suffering is redemptive. Go back to Mississippi, go back to Alabama, go back to South Carolina, go back to Georgia, go back to Louisiana, go back to the slums and ghettos of our northern cities, knowing that somehow this situation can and will be changed.
Let us not wallow in the valley of despair, I say to you today, my friends.
And so even though we face the difficulties of today and tomorrow, I still have a dream. It is a dream deeply rooted in the American dream.
I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal."
I have a dream that one day on the red hills of Georgia, the sons of former slaves and the sons of former slave owners will be able to sit down together at the table of brotherhood.
I have a dream that one day even the state of Mississippi, a state sweltering with the heat of injustice, sweltering with the heat of oppression, will be transformed into an oasis of freedom and justice.
I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.
I have a dream today!
I have a dream that one day, down in Alabama, with its vicious racists, with its governor having his lips dripping with the words of "interposition" and "nullification" -- one day right there in Alabama little black boys and black girls will be able to join hands with little white boys and white girls as sisters and brothers.
I have a dream today!
I have a dream that one day every valley shall be exalted, and every hill and mountain shall be made low, the rough places will be made plain, and the crooked places will be made straight; "and the glory of the Lord shall be revealed and all flesh shall see it together."
This is our hope, and this is the faith that I go back to the South with.
With this faith, we will be able to hew out of the mountain of despair a stone of hope. With this faith, we will be able to transform the jangling discords of our nation into a beautiful symphony of brotherhood. With this faith, we will be able to work together, to pray together, to struggle together, to go to jail together, to stand up for freedom together, knowing that we will be free one day.
And this will be the day -- this will be the day when all of God's children will be able to sing with new meaning:
My country 'tis of thee, sweet land of liberty, of thee I sing.
Land where my fathers died, land of the Pilgrim's pride,
From every mountainside, let freedom ring!
And if America is to be a great nation, this must become true.
And so let freedom ring from the prodigious hilltops of New Hampshire.
Let freedom ring from the mighty mountains of New York.
Let freedom ring from the heightening Alleghenies of Pennsylvania.
Let freedom ring from the snow-capped Rockies of Colorado.
Let freedom ring from the curvaceous slopes of California.
But not only that:
Let freedom ring from Stone Mountain of Georgia.
Let freedom ring from Lookout Mountain of Tennessee.
Let freedom ring from every hill and molehill of Mississippi.
From every mountainside, let freedom ring.
And when this happens, when we allow freedom ring, when we let it ring from every village and every hamlet, from every state and every city, we will be able to speed up that day when all of God's children, black men and white men, Jews and Gentiles, Protestants and Catholics, will be able to join hands and sing in the words of the old Negro spiritual:
My big sister Linda makes the coolest wedding cakes ever. You can see the first one she made us just a few posts back. :) However, she was under a lot of pressure making her Snowflake cake. (Check it out on her blog) and so she did not make our cake the way she had envisioned it. Now this is the coolest cake I have ever seen because it has a bunch of my favorites!! :) Such as my favorite animal and my favorite color! (Lucky me hu? :) ) She posted a really cool picture of elephants on my birthday post and that is what she used as inspiration for the elephants on the cake. :) The cruise ship is in celebration of the cruise we went on, and the Hollywood is for Daniel, as film/acting is one of his passions! It is a chocolate cake, and if it is half as good as the last one.... Yum Yum. But for now it is sitting out on display with my other elephants. I guess it is true that you can't have your cake and eat it too!! LOL
My cousin Katie was recently laid off from her Graphic Design job that she loved so much. She has a portfolio that has been updated with her most recent work! She is currently looking for another graphic design job.
Shopping just became a lot of fun with the addition of child size carts as Smiths! People look at me like I am crazy with kids running around... Maybe I am. :) Kinda crazy about them.
Zoey wanted her hair cut really really bad.... So we took her to get it done today. It is such a new look for her. We love it and think she looks adorable! :)
It is Harrison and Zoey's Mom's birthday today, so we just wanted to take a moment to say,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!
We hope it was a good one! I had a friend that would call her husband's ex-wife her step wife because you really do marry into the exes if they share children. With that being said Elizabeth is definitely the best step wife I could ask for! :) She is a great Mother, and deserves to have an incredible birthday!!
If you haven't heard yet... Daniel and I were married on January 3rd, 2009! The man that married us said Will you..... and each of answered I do, and I will. It is finally official. :) Daniel took the time to make the memory of our trip into a wonderful blog that will last a lifetime! You can view it at ouradventureofalifetime.blogspot.com It will be published as a public blog within the next 24 hours! I hope you enjoy it!!
Since we did not have a traditional wedding, and because we did not choose to have a reception, my sister Linda made us a mini wedding cake! If you look at my hand you can appreciate just how small this cake is! :) Thank you Linda!
